More
specifically, the death of my mother just this past August. The difficulty is I’m not ready to write
about it, nor am I even sure if I have anything to share about her dying, nor
any realization about it. The rawness
of her passing is still too visceral for me, so any understanding about it
eludes me at present.
What I am
noticing is that because I’m feeling compelled to write about this life-altering
occurrence, I’m unable to synthesize any other happening that’s taking
place. Since her death, I feel as if I’m
wading under water or as if I’m in a fog.
My reflexes and responses are sluggish.
Consequently, much is slipping past my notice and the subsequent musings
that would have yielded a worthy reading is also faded away.
Normally,
I can always fall back on reading some article or book, which would inevitably
provoke a response in me. But these
days, even these have failed to elicit an insightful, helpful write-up to share
with you, my reader.
So this month, instead of the usual, you’ll
get just this naked admission -- I feel utterly incapable of sharing some
experience and insight with you.
All
things being equal, perhaps this heartfelt admission is the helpful advice for
this month.
May you
embrace all parts of yourself.
